Kill me please

SO I made mistakes during the actual performance!
Freak. Normal to make mistakes for the first time? RAR!!!! YYY.

Not playing very in-tune is one thing. but forgetting to repeat is the most serious! though managed to follow back after a few notes. Stage fright?

Will DEFINITELY learn from this experience!
Really a good exposure for me.

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Something interesting for me (at least)

1. Standing at the backstage watching the final rehearsal
2. Resting in the performers' resting room
3. Watching the performance live from the tv screen in the room
4. Looking at the digital clock in the room & started counting down. It's really a waste of time if your item is near the finale
5. Watching the (pro) teachers (4 violinists, 2 violas, 2 cellists) rehearsing for their item in the same room
6. Concert coordinators knocking on the rooms to check on & inform performers of their turn
7. Waiting nervously at the backstage

Don't be mistaken. This is actually a small concert in a small audi. Ha! There goes my Sunday!

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Ok. focus on the next upcoming performance at Roland Restaurant.
2 more rehearsals to go!

A reminder for me

You have until end of this year. You're gonna work very very hard on every aspects of your life at the meantime. You will like a breakthrough at least before turning 22. Ha!

feeling

Sooooooo nervoussssss!!! Everyone is playing so professionally well in the school ensemble! Freak. I'm like being force to catch up everyone pace in the shortest time possible. Should I just not do the ensemble for the meantime after this performance & concentrate on 1-to-1? Pros & cons. What's the best way out? Pros: I did improve very fast. Probably cause of the competitiveness. Cons: I'm not learning new stuffs in the ensemble class. A little contradicting though huh.

Upcoming

July 26 - Music school mid-year concert @ RPCC.

August 8 - PLCMC ensemble playing for an Anniversary dinner

September 24 - t.b.c

Probably i have greater interest in jazz violin than classical. It's more me!